Thriller A Cruel Picture

Mr. Burns: I'll keep it short and sweet. Family, religion, friendship: These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. When opportunity knocks, you don't want to be driving to the maternity hospital or sitting in some phoney baloney church...or synagogue.


Not-so-new but haven't got around to posting yet. I'd rather read everybody elses posts and cry from laughter.

Anyway this morning I was watching that episode where they give Bart "Focusyn" for his attention deficit disorder. I almost fainted from a lack of oxygen.

Morning after Bart first took a Focusyn pilli

Marge: Hows my special little guy?

Bart: I'm feeling some side effects from the dope.

Marge: It's not dope! It's to help you concentrate!

Bart: Well I dunno but my testicles won't fit in my underwear!
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Thriller A Cruel Picture

Sparkle Sparkle

Tenille: Did you hear that? The whales are hungry. Homer? Join us.
Homer: Thank you.
Tenille: Tell me, young man, what do you want out of life?
Homer: I want peas!
Tenille: We all want peace! But it's always just out of reach.
Homer: *moans* Uh huh?
Tenille: So, what's the best way to get peace?
Homer: With the knife!
Tenille: Exactly! Not with the olive branch, but the bayonet! Ha, ha, Simpson, you're like the son I never had.
Homer: And you're like the father I never visit.